ok… so I am stressed out – I should have realized it but now that I have been sick for 6 weeks and it is rare that I get sick at all; my doctors, family and friends are pointing to STRESS… and I agree. I have too much on my plate. It is the core of my being though so how do I make the change – I used to be so free-spirited and carefree in my personal life and only type-A in my work life. What happened to that me? Is she still hiding in there under the work and school papers, computers, laundry, dishes, runny noses, and dog hair???? She has to be – right? So I need to do some “spring” cleaning on my house and in my soul. I need to find a way to feel free again – it is possible even with responsibilities and a family.
My current day involves getting up at 645 or 7 or sometimes 5 depending on if everyone sleeps through the night – oh and sometimes they may have yelled out for me or my husband several times throughout the night (I hope that stops soon). Then getting breakfast for everyone while standing and eating my shredded wheat (which works out b/c I like it soggy). Then we run to daycare so I can get to school by 830 for a class that frustrates me to no end because the generation of “college-aged” students have an unbelieveable sense of entitlement – but I will save that for another post or rant. After class, I head to my office, work, then try to get some groceries to have a healthy dinner – pick up the kids around 430 or 5 and head home. Get dinner ready, play superhero or bad guy – depending on my son’s mood and whether my daughter wants to chase us, dancing with them in the kitchen, , snuggle with them as much as I can then read to them, put them in bed and then … actually have a conversation with my husband without interruption and do whatever I need to – clean the dishes, house, schoolwork, etc.
Now, when my husband is in town, he helps with taking them to school, picking them up, getting them in bed, playing music with them, helping with dishes. This is a huge help – and I probably don’t tell him enough in all of the chaos – Honey – I love you and all that you do to help me and I am sorry I do not tell you enough. I will also actually tell him.
Ok so I am stressed – no more and no less than any other parent in the world. I just need to manage it better. My typical answer is running but currently I am unable to run due to illness and injury so … I need to get back to my meditation days and deep breathing exercises. I plan to ease back in with 4 7 8 Breathing Exercises.
This is great because it can be done anywhere, anytime of day, and in any position. When you first start do it in a seated position – back straight and be mindful of your posture. Put the tip of your tongue behind your upper teeth where they meet the tissue and keep it there the entire exercise.
EXHALE completely through your mouth making a sigh or whoosh sound,
Close your mouth and INHALE quietly through your nose to a count of FOUR,
Hold your breath for a count of SEVEN
EXHALE completely through your mouth making the same sound as before but this time to a count of EIGHT (breath out slowly).
Do this sequence a total of 4 times at least once a day if not more.
I am also going to plan my family meals in advance. I don’t know if I mentioned it but I am not a good planner – I am very typically spontaneous so this is going to be hard work but I think it will pay off in the end.
I am going to make time for myself away from my family – ME TIME. I always feel rejuvenated when I do this – I just don’t do it enough.
I am going to cherish my husband and do special things for him and with him. I think too often we and many couples just get in the motion of life and take each other for granted. We all need to be reminded that you love your partner so treat them like you do – talk to them with love and discuss frustration don’t act it out and do small things that let them know you care everyday not just on holidays. This is important for your relationship and also for your children to see the love their parents share and strive toward a positive, loving, caring relationship.